


December 23: and hearts will be glowing

by dizzy



Series: 2017 (the darkest timeline) daily fic advent [23]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 09:49:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13121238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: Prompt:bottom Phil





	December 23: and hearts will be glowing

There's something about the house smelling like mulled wine and the way Phil's fingers are cold when they come in from their walk and the sight of presents under the tree and the knowledge that come the next morning Dan has to leave this mildly extravagant but still somehow cozy little haven. There's something about it that provokes the kind of mood that makes him feel like he's standing on a tightrope, that he could fall off in any direction at any moment and he doesn't know what kind of pit he'll be in when he lands. 

He doesn't want to be sad tonight. He wants to curl in close to Phil and listen to Cornelia sing and listen to Phil's mum scolding Phil's dad and he wants to trap these memories aggressively, knit them into a blanket he can wrap himself up in when he's feeling so strange and alone and struggling with the kinds of demons that lurk in his own childhood bedroom. He's running circles in his own mind trying to make sure he stays in the right kind of light, doesn't linger too long in the wrong kind of shadows. 

Because it's not bad - being here, it's not bad. And leaving, that's not bad either, because there is a part of him that wants his Christmas in his own bed and wants to hug his mum and pet his dog. It's easy to romanticize Phil's reality in his mind but Dan can't truly imagine waking up Christmas morning without his grandma's voice calling out. 

So he dances between regret and relief and he tries to be in the moment while still reassuring himself the next moment will be fine too, and he tries to not let it all be too much-

"Hey," Phil says gently, pulling him out of his own head. "Do you want to go up to bed? 

"Oh," Dan says, because Phil is giving him a sharp eyed look, and come tomorrow morning they won't see each other for nearly a week, and Dan shivers suddenly with something that isn't cold. 

Maybe this is just the distraction from himself he needs. 

* 

Phil's room in this house (his parents' house, Phil always says, and Dan won't lie about the weird territorial pleasure he gets knowing Phil's only home now is the one they share) is bigger than the last one. It's a proper guest room with a touch of Phil and Phil always says he hates that it's so impersonal but he likes how far it is away from the other bedrooms. He likes how when he's visiting and Dan's not with him he can talk to Dan on the phone or skype with no one hearing, and he likes - they discovered last January - how when Dan is with him the distance works well for other reasons. 

* 

They stand and kiss, warming themselves up with familiar lips and touches. Dan's greedy for it right now, greedy for tenderness and love, for another memory to sew into the rest. He runs his hands up the pale warm slope of Phil's back under his shirt, eyes closed and head tilted as Phil kisses his neck. They're being sweet about it - they're not always sweet. Sometimes they're rough, sometimes they're ridiculous, sometimes they take a little more than they give, but it all evens out in the end. 

But they're not often like this. It doesn't often feel new like this, it doesn't feel big and important and like this thing between them - this love, this life, this future they're building - is crackling between their fingertips. 

At least, that's how Dan feels as he pushes Phil back toward the bed until his knees hit the mattress, as Dan lowers himself to straddle Phil's lap and cup Phil's face in his big hands and kiss those pink, soft lips. Phil's hands are eager on Dan's skin now, pushing under his jeans and his pants to cup Dan's ass. It's tender but it's sex and it's body parts and lips and hands and suddenly Dan wants Phil naked, now. 

So he says it, he says, "Naked, now," in a demanding voice that makes Phil laugh a low deep laugh that only spurs Dan on.

* 

"Better?" Phil asks, because he is mostly naked now - only black calvins still clinging to his body, the shape of his dick obvious underneath them. Dan runs a palm over it and feels Phil twitch into the touch. He wants more, but he wants it slow, and he wants to make Phil wait - so he scoots back and goes in with his mouth, skimming his lips over the heat. He can smell Phil strongly here, thick musk clinging to the material of his underwear. Dan likes that smell in a filthy, carnal way, nudging his nose into it and breathing hot. 

Phil lets him, because Phil's actually got plenty of patience in the bedroom - more than Dan sometimes, because Dan is always moving and thinking and analyzing things on five different levels but Phil, Phil gets how to follow his body to chase what feels good without overthinking. He's learned how to let Dan figure it out as well, so Dan gets to play and test and nip and bite and touch and then he gets to let Phil unwind him slowly. 

Most of the time that involves Phil's dick in his ass, fucking him deliciously into the mattress and letting Dan drown in the pleasure of being pinned and held and used and taken care of. 

Tonight Dan wants something else. 

* 

The underwear do come off, eventually. Dan hooks a finger into either side and tugs down, watching the slow reveal of a scatter of slightly trimmed pubic hair and Phil's cock a happy thick length that doesn't really spring up to greet him quite like it used to but still responds eagerly to Dan's touch, especially when Dan does that thing that drives Phil crazy where he leans in and licks the pointed tip of his tongue under the foreskin, swirling it around to dig in just under the head. 

Phil gasps and his hips jerk sharply at the unexpected burst of stimulation. "Dan-" He says, an exhilarated laugh. Dan laughs too, an equally exhilarated response as he sucks the whole head of Phil's cock in his mouth and uses his fingers to tug down the foreskin. He closes his eyes and focuses down on the thickness against his tongue and the taste dick in his mouth, salt and sweat and precome, and how fucking much he loves it. So much, too much - he pulls back with a wet pop and then licks again, licks and kisses down, two fingers firm behind Phil's balls while he sucks one then the other into his mouth. 

"Gonna fuck you," Dan says, and he doesn't go lower than that because he didn't give Phil any warning but his mouth waters and he thinks, when they're home again, it's been a while since he's had his tongue in Phil's ass. "Can I fuck you?" 

"Yeah," Phil says, squirming his ass back into the touch Dan isn't quite giving him. "Yeah, please-" 

Phil always gives it up so easy, always asks for it nicely and politely with a moderately wrecked voice. Dan drops grateful kisses onto Phil's thighs and then braces himself with his hands on the bed and pushes himself up. 

* 

A sexual intermission: Phil getting a towel from the bathroom so they don't leave stains on Phil's parents guest linens, Dan fetching the lube from the toiletries bag of the suitcase Phil checked.

"Hi there," Phil says, towel places on the bed and situating himself on it while Dan crosses the room back to him. He's looking at Dan's cock, bobbing between his legs, untouched so far and likely to stay that way. Dan's always too eager when he's going to be in Phil, he's mostly past the point of unexpected endings but old habits die hard. 

* 

"Ah, ah-" 

Dan keeps careful track of Phil's steady little gasps of breath as he pushes a second finger in. Phil always takes longer to prep, always feels the discomfort a little more intently. He flinches away from pain far more quickly and fearfully than Dan - doesn't understand how sometimes Dan welcomes the stretch a little too brightly, wants it to burn a little. 

But they can still respect what they don't understand and Dan doesn't mind the extension of foreplay that this is, listening to discern the good noises from the bad and keeping one hand idly stroking Phil so he doesn't go soft while the other dances around his prostate in uneven touches. There's a goal here, a method to his madness, and that goal is to get Phil to that point where he truly wants more. 

"Yeah," Phil says. It's a good noise, the really good kind of noise. "Dan, please." 

* 

He watches his dick disappear into Phil. It's not a surreal moment; he's done this plenty of times. But it's still a really fucking nice moment and Dan heart is still pounding and Phil's hands are shaking and his dick is a needy kind of red between their bodies and it's a sensory overload in the best kind of way. 

He doesn't stop until he's in as far as he can go, and he waits for Phil to breathe again before he pulls out and thrusts back in. Not too hard, not too fast, respectful of the late hour and the quiet of the night and the mood between them. But steady and good and hot and it's almost, almost just right, until he gets his mouth to Phil's and then - yes, fuck, that's it, that's everything, dirty hot sex kisses with open mouths and too much tongue but it doesn't matter because this is the height of intimacy that's only for them and never, never for the world. 

* 

Dan is too close too fast like he always is, stopping and starting and letting Phil gently laugh at him. Dan doesn't care, he doesn't care because it feels so fucking good, and he just refuses for it to be over already. He gasps for breath and clenches his hands into the duvet on either side of Phil's head and rocks hips in and out in barely-moving motions when he has to. Phil's hands are on his back, moving up and down erratically, groping his ass and squeezing and urging him on and it's a wonder Phil even gets anything out of this - but he does, apparently, because he's still hard between their bodies and he's whispering to Dan that he's going to come, Dan's going to make him come- 

And Dan comes, because of course he does. He tries to pull out but Phil's hands are on his ass keeping him in, and that's different, that's new, Phil normally hates the mess. "In me," Phil whispers, and Dan feels punched from the inside out. It's a filthy porn kind of move but it works, because he's fucking _coming_ in _Phil_ and it appeals to a base satisfaction in him. With a strangled moan he stifles further against Phil's shoulder, a pained keening sound and the pulse, pulse, pulse of his dick as he thrusts in as hard as he can and stays suspended in the moment until he thinks he's done, pulling out just for the final ooze to catch against the rim of Phil's stretched open hole. 

He can't even speak, chest burning because he'd held his breath without even realizing it. Phil's hand is fumbling for Dan's and guiding Dan's fingers to his dick and Dan's just coherent enough to make a fist for Phil to fuck up into. He kisses Phil again, cobbling brain cells together enough to make it good as Phil gasps out his desperation and works his hips harder, faster, up, up. 

It doesn't take long for him to feel the warmth of Phil's come webbing against his fingers, dripping down onto Phil's stomach. He's glad they put the towel down because he can't bring himself to properly give a fuck about the mess. 

* 

But they do, eventually, give a fuck about the mess. 

Phil disappears into the bathroom to clean himself up and out with privacy while Dan cracks the window and lights a Christmas candle. 

As he turns back the duvet and dims the light his mind is a pleasant blank. His body feels tired and his mind feels tired and his heart feels full, never moreso than when Phil walks out naked from the bathroom with his glasses on and a spot of toothpaste at the corner of his mouth and his hair a sex mess still and his dick flaccid between his thighs. He's a whole entire mess of a human being that Dan gets to love and keep and in a day or two when Dan is fighting the night hour, whether in their bed alone in London or back in childhood entrapments, that's the thought that Dan will curl up with tightest to help keep the warmth inside.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on [tumblr](http://alittledizzy.tumblr.com)! or [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/alittledizzy)! or don't! your choice! happy holidays!


End file.
